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We have adopted 4 children and done foster care for 6. Also had two girls in our home, ages 8 and 11 that I fell in love with and thought I had gotten ALL of the information possible on them and it was mostly very positive. But we had to disrupt their adoption because they had issues the agency was not aware of that affected (and would have GREATLY affected) the lives of our other children. I have always felt a pull to older girls and still hope against hope that it could not be true that there is NO older child that cannot be adopted with keeping your family in tact. But I'm beginning to doubt it. Is that sad to me? You bet!! The oldest child we adopted was 2 and had been in only one foster placement. It was still very different from adopting the 3 we got as infants but she's 8 years old tomorrow and doing beautifully. I so agree with most of what was said above. And for now because I still have it in my heart to help an older girl (who I hope needs me), I am volunteering for a mentorship program in our county. I will spend a few hours a month with this child and it will not impact my other children the same way adoption would yet I still feel that I am hopefully lending support to a child who needs me.
Josie
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