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Anarchamama---I think I understand EXACTLY what you are talking about.
We were JUST approved for our adoption. The first hurdle in adoption. It kept me BUSY just trying to reach the goal. We WANT another child to parent. It wasnt until the adoption was approved that I had time to sit back and PONDER the potential details.
I started reading about parenting a biracial baby--becoming a transracial family--etc, etc. I think my reading has only INCREASED my fears of "what if". My DH in all of HIS wit and wisdom has advised me to STOP READING! Said we have been successful in raising our two boys and we will do JUST FINE with our adopted child.
I appreciate his simplistic optomism however, I DO think we need to be armed for what we are about to embark on.
There are days I worry about things from HOW will I learn to fix her hair....to.....how will I deal with racism? And everything inbetween.
Some days I get cold feet. Some days I wonder if its FAIR for us to bring a biracial child into a cc family---will our child feel she got the short end?? Thats just honest. But MOSTLY I cant WAIT to meet our new child! I believe we CAN handle any obsitcle that comes our way in the best way we can.
I wonder if ANYONE ever has all the answers. I wonder if ANYONE ever goes into this with NO fears, NO questions, NO hesitation. I wonder if Im WRONG to feel these ways.
I love this child already. I think thats why I want whats best for them. I hope and PRAY thats US.
Long story short. I think its good to know you are not alone. At least as far as I'M concerned!! xoL
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