Dear Ave Marie Bucy,
I am 22yrs old and I know exactly how you feel. I was adopted in either 89 or 90 when I was either 9 or 10yrs old by what I thought was my step father. I thought my mother and him had been married since I was about 4yrs old but come to find out they didn't get married until 1999 (after I got married in 1998). I know the adoption took place because I have both birth certificates the original with my "birth father's" name and the amended one with my "step father's" name. Now I find out that my birth father may not be my real birth father after all these years. My "step father" was very abusive towards me and my mother and my mother kept telling me that i deserved everything I got. I ended up in a foster home when I was 16yrs old. The man I suspect is my birth father is in a Florida State Prison sentenced to life. My mother refused to leave my "step father" even though he was abusing me because she believed I did something to provoke it and that I deserved it. My mother has never told me the truth about anything my entire life. The man that I thought to be my birth father has already agreed to a paternity test. He has told me that even if the test proves he is not by biological father that I will always be his daughter no matter what any test shows. When I met the man who may or may not be my birth father, I discovered that I had 2 younger sisters and a younger brother. I met my brother soon after I met him, but his mother moved and I lost contact with him. Just recently I met one of my sisters. I just don't want to hurt the people I thought to be my family. My mother knows nothing about what I am doing because she would probably just lie to me even more than what she already has.
Ave Marie, if you would like to talk with me (I would like to talk with you) send me your email address and I will email you my phone number. Maybe we can work together to get our issues resolved. My email address is
jfmabrown@aol.com
Ave Maried I hope everything works out for you. I truly know how you feel. Just remember there is someone here in you same situation who could use someone to talk to who understands.