[shelbydog]

A few things pop to mind. First of all, you mentioned they are in daycare. Are they comfortable/social in daycare? My son is 4.5 and had a hard time expressing himself in social situations, esp. when more than one child was present. He also has sensory issues and some delays, and he gets OT and for him, making friends and social interaction has been something we have had to help teach him. He tends to stay on the sidelines and watch, or misinterpret other kids' reactions. Example: a child says hello. Evan says hello REALLY quietly under his breath with a scowl on his face...the child walks away and Evan gets upset saying, "He doesn't hear me!!" I would try 2 things.

One - role play at home. Use dolls, or their favorite toys. They are old enough to understand that being nice is polite and if they are rude, people will not want to be around them. Talk to them about how their behaviors make others feel.

Two - I would arrange playdates and as many activities (low key - not big groups) so they can practice. They may also feel "stronger" together since they are together vs. only children (hope that makes sense). I wonder if playdates with them separate would help? Then they wouldn't have each other as an alliance.

My son also reacts strangely to certain things. Just today we were picking Mia up and a boy was playing with a toy and Evan had this "exorcist" voice toward the boy for NO reason at all. I think part of it is age, experimentation. But if it is really bad I would treat it as a skill that has to be practiced and learned. Good luck!