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Old 11-08-2006, 07:12 AM
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momraine momraine is offline
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First off to correct a few misconceptions. I too decided to go International for a few reasons, but in my research I learned that the birth parents coming back is very, very rare, that's why it makes the news. It's so rare. Also they do not have a year to change thier mind, in many states they only have 48 hours. The longest I know if is six months, but that is not the case in most states. Also not all states even allow you to pay living or medical expenses for birth parents and not all of them ask for it, you can tell the agency that you are not willing to pay those costs, also there is adopting from foster care to consider. Most foreign adoptions will NOT be newborns. Most countries do not allow children to be adopted until they are sure that no one in thier home country wants them, that combined with the paperwork means that a child is likely to be at least six months old on some countries and even older in others. Also if you are barely getting by now, you will want to come up with a plan for how you will support a child, they can be quite expensive, they want silly things like clothes and food. LOL, Anyway, good luck with your decision. Oh and don't expect the child to be grateful for your "saving"" them. Once they are adopted, you need to treat them the same as you would treat a child you gave birth to, not as a project or anything else. Not that you would, but I have seen it. To decide on a country is difficult. One way is to first eliminate countries that won't work for you. Some have age requirements others might have income requirements, Korea has weight requirements, etc. So first eliminate the countries you cannot adopt from for those reasons. Then decide if you want to travel, that will further eliminate some countries. Then you can look at the age and such of the available children and see if it agrees with what you are wanting for your family. If you have racial preferences that will also make a difference. The more open you are as to age, special needs, siblings, etc. The more choices you will have.
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Lorraine
Mom to:
S- my 16 year old son -Aspergers, but doing great!
W - my 14 year old son- caretaker to his siblings.
P- My 10 year old Russian princess, two prosthetic legs, dancer extrodiaire Home June 2000
M- 9 No legs, one arm, fast wheels!
Home November 2006 from Poland!
Dh - Often just another child, but mostly my best friend and a pretty understanding guy.

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