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And on the flip side, Leigh, DH and I are also keeping our visits with the birth family "secret" (they know we write, send pix, etc.)....This is really as a result of a couple of things: DH's feeling like it will be DD's place to tell our extended family about visits if she decides to (DH is himself adopted, and thinks he knows "best" sometimes - - annoying!) and frankly, the "uneasiness" I think our (relatively old) parents would have with the thoughts of visits (why? not sure, "old school" stuff). I hate secrets....hate 'em...they eat me up...
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