I cannot imagine how this has been on you. As a hopeful adoptive mom I look to these boards to find out how a birth mom feels. Ours is a contested adoption by the birth father. The birth mom and I have always gotten along from day one and still do to this day. I feel in our situation the importance was being able to respect one another's wishes and concerns. I saw first hand the courage and extreme love she had when choosing adoption for her baby. I can not ever forget what she went through to give her baby the greatest gift life. For us, the birth mom is a special part in our hearts if not for her, we would never know how it feels to hear the words "mommy and daddy". She has blessed us so very much!! Its of great importance that a child grow up with knowledge of his/her biological parents and the love they will always have in their hearts. I just try so hard to understand what it must be like, and reading some of these post give me some of the insight I need. I think too many times the adoptive parents are scared of the adopted child to know the truth-about adoption. Especially years ago. I hope you and your son can spend some quality time together and he realizes you love him with all your heart. Praying to God might help you find the strength to cope with how you feel.
