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One thing to remember is that nothing says you can't do both! That's what I'm doing. There are pros and cons to each. For me, the pros of independent adoption, working with an experienced adoption attorney are:
- you have some control (ha ha) over the process, who you meet, how the selection is made, etc.
- independent can be much less expensive than agency, depending on the agency program, whether bmom expenses are paid, how long you have to search/advertise, etc.
- if you feel like things are lagging, you can kickstart the effort by placing more/new ads, talking to more people, etc.
- you can make sure that the prospective bmom gets appropriate legal counsel and therapy.
- you have direct contact with the expectant mom.
The pros of agency are:
- someone is (theoretically) always working on your match, even when you don't have the energy to search anymore
-though the fees may be higher, agency fees are more predictable, and generally will at least roll over if you have a failed match
- a good agency will provide thorough adoptive and birth parent counseling for as long as it's needed
- there's someone else there to filter the calls and also as a buffer with the expectant mom when you need it.
HTH!
Char
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