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I would think it very likely that you have some sort of attachment disorder. Reactive attachment disorder is just one type. Also, the research and "existence" of attachment disorders is really only 10-15 years old so in your situation no one probably had any idea that this might happen.
I am just learning about attachment disorders as my 5 year old is being very physically aggressive and out of control in kindergarten where she does not do any of this at home. We have found a great therapist who was adopted and had attachment disorder herself, so we feel in good hands. It does not look like an easy road ahead for our daughter (or for us), but we do have hope that we can go back and really bond with her and go forward from there.
Attachment disorders can come for adopted kids even who were placed right away with adoptive parents. Given your story (from the other post) with abuse and possibly neglect and violence, I would think you would greatly benefit from some counseling to get at those emotions and start healing inside.
Probably the most famous book on RAD is by Nancy Thomas - I think it's called something like "Learning to Love" with another subtitle under it. Maybe if you read it you could see yourself there.
Best to you - I didn't dream my daughter had a painful past when we got her at 3 days old and it breaks my heart. Reading your story makes it break again. But we must believe that God can heal and restore!
Jane
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