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Originally Posted by teegrainca
Thank you all so much for your words of support. It means the world just to know that you are not the only one who has felt this way and that as long as your actions don't reflect your feelings and you can work through them, that all is well.
I am already feeling better. It's so nice to have a place like this to get it out. Most of my friends and family are not the best people to talk to about this stuff. They aren't the most supportive or understanding about open adoption and any negative feelings would feed their opinions that it's not the best way to go. I really don't need that kind of support, if you know what I mean. They mean well... this much I know.
Thanks, again!
Karen
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Karen ~ you are not alone. At all. I empathize completely with having to work through these kind of feelings over and over. It's taken a really long time for me to even feel comfortable when others call my children "my children". I know they are in my heart and mind, but it's been hard not feeling disloyal (? don't know if that is really the right word??) or untruthful by calling them mine, when the fact is, I share them with someone else. I work through these feelings lots. I know I'm their Mom yet I know that I share that role, even if my children's first mothers are not overly involved at the moment. I hope they will be in the future.
As for friends understanding, that is truthfully why I come here. Most people IRL don't understand what open adoption really means and it freaks them out to think we are keeping that door open. So you do have to find alternate avenues of support.
Blessings...