[bmLisa]

I need some advice from all of you. My son just turned a year old, and I have a semi-open relationship with my son's parents. I receive letters and pictures 3-4 times a year through my adoption agency. I am lucky though in that my social worker is also their social worker. Andrea shares a close relationship with them, and also with me. It has been very easy for me to request additional pictures from them through her. I have even been able to ask her to give them a call and find out how they are all doing whenever I just feel like a little extra news. My boyfriend and I even got to spend an afternoon with their family when Cole was 6 months old. I worked as a cashier for almost a year at a department store in town, and saw Cole's mom a few times. She even brought me a Mother's Day gift while I was at work. They have been very accomodating whenever I make requests for more pictures, and have even agreed to make a home video for us before Christmas.

Since Cole just turned 1, I have begun to wish for a more personal relationship with his parents. Andrea suggested that I start writing a short letter occasionally so that holidays and his birthday are not the only times we communicate. I would love to start writing notes, even to just catch her up on our lives, but do not know where to start. I want to get to know her more personally, and want to share myself with her as well. Andrea feels that that kind of relationship would not be unwanted by Cole's mom. I would love to get to the point where I could pick up the phone and call her directly some day. I do not want to interfere in their lives, I just think that the more we know eachother, the easier it will be for to have an open relationship for Cole's sake. Before he was born they said that he would know about us and our love for him and that if he ever decided he wanted to meet us that they would support him in that.

I know some of you have the kind of relationship that I would love to have. I am not a natural born conversationalist, and have a hard time talking to people I do not know. I would love any advice from anyone.

hugs
Lisa