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Sorry!!
We had 2 failed adoptions and the grief is very profound. For me, I didn't want any comments like, "Your child will find you someday",or "It wasn't meant to be". That hurt like heck! They'll be able to come to that realization in their own time. It helped me for my good friends to let me just vent and cry whenever I needed.
Take your cues from them, too. There were people trying to console me and I asked them not to talk about it, because I was at work and didn't want to fall apart. When I was able to discuss it in public, I did. I went through all the stages of grief; it felt like a death. They may be this way, or maybe not. Let them know you'll listen or do whatever when they need you. They'll appreciate your consideration.
Big hugs to you all!
Michelle
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