[ellemeth]

To me there is a very real difference between an open handed swat to a clothed bottom (more to startle than hurt) and a beating or even just regular spankings.

My daughter has felt the flat of my hand twice and only recently. My criteria for “spanking,” which for me is a single open hand swat to the bottom, is that she must already know and understand the rule, be capable of obeying it, and there must be danger involved. The two danger area that have deserved a swat so far are crawling into the dog’s crate (a grab and swat is better than losing her face to a temperamental 130 pound canine) since she has been reliable in that matter since she was about 3 and trying to put her hand on a waffle iron.

A swat is not a beating. I’ve had beatings (from my mother). I’ve had spankings also from my father who had the “spare the rod and spoil the child” philosophy and I’ve had single open handed swats from a firm grandparent. They are all definitely different. My daughter will never know the first two and I pity the poor fool who dares try something like that with my daughter. But the last is in my opinion, sometimes necessary to make a lasting impression when there isn’t time for discussion. Discussion should follow and also a consequence (i.e. no story before bed or time out) but there are times where an immediate result and not a discussion or a debate is necessary.