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Probably not what you are looking for but here goes:What do you like best about being closed?
Given that it was the only way our agency did adoptions back in the day I am gratful to have my ds but besides that it has not been so great for usNot much. I guess it is less complicated at the holiday time when we try to see all of our family but really it has not been as
What do you wish you could change?
I would have tried to find the birthfamily within the first few months to giv them the option of contacting us. Ds would have really liked that. I think that some birthparent go into an adoption plan thinking that they want closed or thinking that that is the only option but a few years later might want something different
Would you still chose closed if you had an option?
Yes if the situation was right. Sometimes closed adoptions are the best solution but having done both I think when possible open works better for my family and certainly for my kids so far.
What would you like people to know about closed adoptions?
Each adoption is unique and what works in one situation is not the best thing in another. I would tell people to be flexible and don't make assuptions about a family's motivations based on the level of openness in their adoptions but then again I could say the same thing about open adoptions as well.
lisa
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