[pechocha]

So sorry you had to go thru this bad exprerience... However, you said the following: "Even more hopefully some of you will ask yourselves if you were really doing this for the children, or have you been doing this for yourselves.". I think you should ask that questions yourself as well, as you wrote in your initial post, how excited you were that this case was leaning towards adoption. Nor did you mention how sad you were for the child and the family, because even though we may be waiting to adopt a baby/child, it is still sad that this kids have to go thru so much in their short lives. Now, it seems a little strange that this kid has been in the system for a little over a month, since you said you were in pin and needles all that time waiting. Maybe you shouldn't jump in into this situation not knowing all the details. You knew going into fost/adopt that all the placements you'll get have some risks, especially in infants. And one last thing, please do not fuss or judge in public, about birth parents not doing what they are supposed to do, keep it to yourself... Even though they did wrong, they are still part of your child, and you always have to talk nicely about them with your foster child until he/she could understand better.

We are fost/adopting our 10 month old baby, TPR has been granted, and are really close to finalize, and I still think about her birth mom. I always think all things she'll be missing out by not being able to raise her but at the same time I respect and honor her for having the courage to relinquish her rights and acknowledge that she was not able to parent.

Work towards your anger, and you will see the light at the end of the tunnel. Wish you luck on your journey.