[BrandyHagz]

In an attempt to create a more positive environment for all of our members, I have been advocating for change within the site regarding the use of the term ‘Birthmother’ when discussing or addressing a pregnant woman who is considering an adoption plan.

One of the people I have been speaking with came back with the following statement, which is why I wanted to bring the statement to you:

If you can call a pregnant women a mother before the act of giving birth, it certainly stands to reason that you could call a pregnant woman considering adoption a birthmother before giving birth, so why the split hairs?

So, if we can call a pregnant woman a mother before giving birth, why do we have an issue with calling a birthmother a birthmother before she has terminated her rights?

This isn’t my opinion on things – again, this was presented to me when the discussion was opened up by someone who is not a part of our business, but by someone who does work in the industry and genuinely wanted to know what my answer was to that question.

This topic isn’t a debate – I’d rather not see this thread turn nasty, but rather give me ammunition for a discussion that will be forth coming in the weeks ahead.

At this point, I have expressed the opinion that all change comes with opposition – that in the end, someone will rally against it for the sole purpose of ‘this is how it’s always been’. At this point, I have had some favorable feedback on my request – but I would like additional information that I can take to the meetings regarding this topic.

My plan is to copy and print out your comments – as members of the adoption community (not just our community, but the adoption community at large) and take them with me to our meetings so that the people I work for and work with can see that this isn’t just a one woman campaign for change, it’s a campaign led for and supported by those who are members of the triad.

Again, I ask you not to turn this into a debate…simply state your opinions and move on – if you’d like to debate the pro’s and con’s of adoption terminology or the use of coercive language in adoption, please create another thread to do it in.

Thanks so much!