[Miranda4Him]

Oh my goodness, can I relate to this!

When my husband & I first brought our 2 newly adopted toddlers home from Ecuador, I naively thought the affection they showed their new grandparents was adorable. I figured they understood the concept of 'grandma & grandpa' that I had explained to them. I now know differently.

My 2 little ones would climb in & out of their laps, give them kisses, lay all over them and beg for food. They both have severe food issues, and regardless of the fact that I would tell my parents NOT to let them climb all over them - they said it was fine and continued to allow it.

My mother would also feed them as often as they begged for food.... which was non-stop. I once watched my 1 1/2 yr old gorge himself until he vomited, and then continue to eat until all the food was gone. (His caregiver from the orphanage was feeding him at the time, and I sat there and watched helplessly as it was the first day I was meeting my children.) Both of my toddlers have stuffed so much food in their mouths that I have had to dig it out because they are choking and cannot breathe. All the while they are completely hysterical because I am 'taking away their food'.

I have asked my mother on numerous occasions to NOT feed them. My husband & I make sure they are well fed with healthy portions; we NEVER deprive them! She will not and has not respected my wishes, so I haven't been in contact with her for awhile.

I have also had to tell other family members & friends not to allow inappropriate behavior or to feed them. I feel uncomfortable, as I am not a confrontational-type of person, however I know it is for my children's best interest.

I feel better knowing I am not alone. Thank you for venting! Not only did you help me realize how harmful inappropriate interactions can be, but it also gives me confidence to stand up for what right for my children.