[BurntBrat]

I'm new here. I've found all the forms and know what I need to do to get started. But upon researching some of the exhaustive things that need to be done I'm wondering if the outcome will even be successful. Here's my situation...

My husband and I have been married for 5 years, living together for 7. We've lived in Texas for 5 years as well. I have a 10-year-old daughter from a previous relationship (never married the father). My husband has been in her life and supporting her since she was a little over 2. Her biological father has never paid a penny in child support, but then I've also never sued him. I have done well enough financially that I didn't think it was worth the hassle for the little amount of money I'd get (he's an over 30 perpetual student and lives off grant money and the occasional summer job). Her biological father sees her for two weeks during the summer, and one week during the holidays. He calls her once a month if she is lucky, but has gone over two months without speaking to her. When she was younger I used to hassle him about keeping in touch, but now I don't care anymore. As my daughter has grown older she feels more and more left out because she has two siblings that are both mine and my husbands. She makes comments about the last name and things like that. My husband has never shown favoritism, he actually wanted to adopt her in the beginning but I said no because I thought it was important for her to have a relationship with her dad. Now my daughter hates going to her dad's house. He's not a responsible guy, and she has to fend for herself usually. He let her go to the community swimming pool alone during the afternoons last summer and that didn't sit well with me (maybe I'm just paranoid, but I don't think 9 is old enough to be out alone for hours). But the last straw was when she returned from his house this summer and she told me that he always yells at her when she cries (she's always very homesick the first few days) and accuses her of loving her step dad more than she loves him. I know her father has a terrible temper and can become violent if pushed really hard, but I didn't know that he'd been getting angry with her to that point. So my daughter and I talked about my husband adopting her. She wants to do it, but she seems a little tentative because she's afraid she'll have to see her dad and he'll lose his temper. I don't think her father will voluntarily give up his parental rights, even with the threat of having to pay child support. I would like to explain to him that it doesn't mean he won't see her again, he just won't have a legal say in her life (does he really have a legal say right now? I don't think so). Do you think it's worth it to go through with this when the father is sort-of involved and it will probably be a big fight? Anyone know my chances of getting his rights terminated without his consent? Any advice? Past experience? Thanks for all your help in advance. It's a big decision and I can use all the input I can get.