Sorry, no easy answer and the bottom line is do what you need to do for your children, period. These people are adults and they will have to figure out a way to deal with the rules of attachment parenting. Your children are children ( and only acting the only way they know how to survive) and its our job as parents to enforce and be consistant or suffer for it later on (and sometimes sooner rather than later, just read the stories on these forums from people that "thought" everything was just great and their children were social butterflys
). We have all dealt with this grandparent stuff (and some other relatives) and its hard at first and you will not be popular but you cannot worry about them and your children, its too stressful. Your priority is your children and you are on the right track for sure with your attachment parenting so do what needs to be done, 2 years from now you will be very happy you did it, and the rest of the family will be over it!!!! Good Luck!!!!