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Luca has been home with us for a little over a year and he was 2 1/2 when he picked him up. We do talk about adoption with him...it's not a secret. We show him pictures of the pick up trip and of his life in Guatemala. He likes to look at them and talk about them.
I know that since he is only 3, he is not grasping the "total picture". Just bits and pieces. So, we are very basic and just answer the questions that he asks. There have been a few times when we've changed the subject because I think the adoption talk may be bothering him. For instance, one day, Luca was playing with some friends and he came over to me and jumped on my lap. He said "mom, i don't ever want to go back to Guatemala". I told him that he would always be with us and that we would never take him back. And then he asked, "was I all alone in Guatemala?" I reassured him that he was with someone who loved and cared for him until I could get to him. It's a hard thing for kids to understand and I think you just have to gear your discussions to your specific child. You'll know what they are ready to hear and understand.
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