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We do. Her birthday is actually just a month after H's. Last year I took her to lunch and got her a small gift. Believe me, I can empathize with the schedule and the reluctance to add ANYTHING else to the "to do" list---you have your hands full--- but it might actually help improve the relationship.
I think I was pretty self absorbed at 16, so I'd probably cut her some slack for her age and send her a card and a little gift. Our coordinator told me something that's kind of stuck with me---she said "You know, you're really getting a baby AND a teenager here---you have an opportunity to be a mentor to her." So that's how we decided to look at our relationship with H's bparents---as an opportunity.
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