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My husband and I are 36 and 47, and we adopted domestically within 8 months; it would have been much faster, but we had a long match in which the mother decided to parent, so we missed several opportunities. Now, we are AA, and were open to full or part AA children, including boys (which we got), so we had a larger pool. But I can tell you that you and your husband are pretty young for adoptive parents; there were many at my agency who were both in their late 40s.
Yes, domestic adoptions sometimes do fall through, maybe even frequently, but to me, the failed match was something I could deal with; waiting for a foreign government to release my child so that I could bring her home from an orphanage was not. I think it's all about what you feel comfortable with.
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