[ldurham]

What exactly is a "curly hair salon"?

I think you would have to agree with me that your hair (I don't know if you've ever had any chemical processes done to your hair) and that of a child who has never had a chemical process are not the same. Pantene for women of color products may not be the best product to use as it is a more "adult" product intended for individuals that have color treated and/or permed hair (although it says it's great for natural styles as well - some beauticians would disagree since it is not an organic product).

Additionally, if I were you I would ask to see the license of the "professional" stylist (cosmotolgist -whatever) that told you that combs and brushes wreck havoc on African American hair. Finger combing may have been appropriate for your hair - or even hair style, but not for a child. Without combing from root to tip you are not shedding the dead hair that accumulates daily - thus the matting and breakage. It can also contribute to the child being tender-headed which will only make the washing and styling of the hair worse. Brushing the hair increases scalp stimulation and promotes growth. Once again, the key is keeping the hair moisturized.

I'm not going to argue your "AA-ness" with you. What offends one may not offend another. It makes no difference what your race is. My offense was in the choice of words (Pantene for colored hair) and the idea that people of color should not comb or brush their hair lest that want "havoc" to run rampid through their lives.

However, regardless of the offense (which was 1) individual and 2) acknowledged that it may not have been intentional) I still can empathize with the concern that TracyK has and offered a resolution which I hope she find useful.

TracyK - I apologize if this thread turned into more than you bargained for and I mean with all sincerity that I hope you do find some of my suggestions useful and that hair washing and styling do not become a source of frustration for you and your daughter.