[Archive]

Ladies,
I am sorry that things did not work out the way they were promised. I read this board to get another perspective as I will be adopting some day once we save the funds. I have seen some good things and some bad and the more I read the more frightened I become of adopting domestically. I have had 2 tubal pregancies which nearly killed me and I lost my babies and my tubes so I can no longer conceive on my own. I have gone through fertility treatments, put my body through heck because I want to have a family. It is now 5 years since we started and we have now started the adoption process. Though my body does not work, I do not consider myself less worthy of having children and raising them with my husband. I have been through the ringer and so much more that I will not even write here but most importantly I must thank you for writing your true feelings. I know that not all birthmom's feel the same but just seeing how many of you do have bitter feelings has confirmed my decision adopt internationally. There are thousands of abandoned babies in orphanages and I would rather go through the trials of international adoption than know that there was someone who regretted me adopting their child. You see, I know that it is so hard for all of us but I could not go through adoption worrying that the birthmom felt she made the wrong decision. I just want to be a mother and have children with my husband. Good luck to all of you and I really am sorry about what you've had to endure.

K