|
I am so going to get flamed for this...
I don't mind hearing people complain about pregnancy or parenthood. As wonderful as pregnancy and parenting are, they aren't wonderful all the time. I think it does a tremendous disservice to women who are ttc, are newly pregnant or are new mothers by either birth or adoption when we pretend that pregnancy and parenthood as the best things ever.
Pregnancy, adoption and being a new parent are life changing things, and I don't think we prepare people for it very well. When we romanticize pregnancy and mothering and let it take on a mythic status where every day is supposed to be spent in a blissful state of complete and utter joy, we only increase the shock and even depression that many women feel when they DON'T experience that 24/7 bliss they think they're supposed to feel. I don't think it just applies to pregnancy either - how many people experience post-adoption depression? Apparently enough that this site has a whole board devoted to it.
For me, the more I wanted to get pregnant, the more pregnancy became this awesome state of existence. Then, when I finally DID become pregnant, I realized that even though it's a tremendous blessing, sometimes it really sucks! I wish that more people had been honest with me about what it would really be like. Now that I have a new baby, I love her and know how fortunate I am to have her, but I wish I'd known a little more about what it would REALLY be like to have a newborn at home. In fact, I think hearing others complain about their pregnancies or about the challenges of life with a newborn made me feel a lot better because it helped me see that my experience is normal!
We all experience the journey to parenthood and those first few months of parenthood differently, and I see nothing wrong with allowing people to voice their truths and tell their stories, even if they aren't perfectly happy all the time.
|