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Thank you all for responding.
I do appreciate all the feedback.
I know it sounds like it's a lot of exercise.. I was focused on that when I wrote this thread. I do do more than that and lots of positive reinforcement and treats (not food) and other things. But I have found that the kids know they get love. We tell them all the time. I wasnt pointing fingers. I was just trying to say that everyone needs more hands on training.
Imagine if you were left in a room alone w/ a child that suffered from one or more disorders.. How would you handle it??? It's one thing to say.. get down to his/her level and talk in a nice even keeled voice.. but it's another to be "stuck, locked or forced" into a room where you have a kid kicking and screaming and banging his head on the ground for attention.
Now what would you do?? If you had no training you might go and try to pick him up.. now he just bit you on the face... or what ever else might happen for him/her to lash out at you..
Did your 10 Maps/impact classes prepare you for this?? I dont think so.. So what can we do to help each other become better foster parents??
And I think it's wrong that these kids get bounced around. I know that we as fp once a situation isnt going the way it should can call DFCS to come pick up the kids.. AND BELIEVE ME.. I KNOW THAT SOME KIDS WE CANT HELP... but if someone only guided us better then maybe there would not be so much jumping around from house to house.
I believe that we each should have our own mentor.. someone that has been in fostercare longer than we have.. that we can call when we are ready to pull our hair out.. Or when our heart is beating faster and our blood pressure is rising... The CW's dont want to hear that we are having a hard time.. or come pick up this kid.. and they tell you there isnt another place for them to go. Or it will take a week or two to find another foster home.
Imagine if we had a county list.. that said.. hey Mark has been trained to deal w/ children that have been sexually abused.. if you have any questions or need anything call him.. or Tina knows how to handle children w/ RAD.. call her if you need anything.
Just like the saying it takes a village to raise a child... We should have access to our village. And then our training should be more hands on and not just book oriented. Maybe perhaps we need to conduct our Impact classes at a group home or a mental facility and see how to deal w/ some of these issues..
Again really thanks for your responses.. Maybe this might help someone else that is having problems w/ the child/ren in their care.
AJ
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