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We've always planned on calling my sons' bmom Aunt as well. Of course, she actually is my sister, so she *is* their aunt. Her ex husband (who is not the bf) is insistent on telling their kids that my triplets are their cousins. I think, if it were possible, all of the adults involved would choose to not tell the boys who their birthmother is until they are older. There are enough children in the family who are aware of the situation, however, that this isn't feasible.
I think calling your son's bmom Aunt is ok. I have close friends who are "Aunts" to my children, and hubby's favorite "Aunt and Uncle" growing up were in no way related to him, just his parent's best friends. I doubt he ever confused them for his parent's siblings.
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