[ajrl]

I agreed to take in a new placement last week. 10 year old boy w/ ADHD and ODD. The last foster parents could not handle it.

I think that DFCS has me pegged to help out the ones that no one else can work with...THIS IS PERFECTLY FINE W/ ME. But darn it.. Why are people like this???

I am again the 6th house that he has been at in only 2 months.

The other houses couldnt get him up for school, get him to do homework, or to have a peaceful day.

Now mind you I am strict and the first day I tell in a nice voice.. here are my rules if you dont listen to me then we will have to do things the hard way. Every time you misbehave and it's for the same "crime" over and over you will get extra punishment. So then I explain what our punishment is..

First it is talking... hmmm does not good then move on
Then we go through a regimine of exercises.. none of which are fun.. easy ones to start.. if you give me a hard time then we go to a second one.. then that one you get for 5 mins.. then you give me a hard time and the timer goes up one min per outburst.

So first test... Did not do homework in afterschool care... Found out that day.. and I said.. here is your punishment for not doing homework.. What ever you were assigned then you have to do that plus either tonight or tomorrow depending on our time frame you owe me the same amount of homework you didnt do. So for example, you didnt do your 8 sentences you now have to do it.. Cant go to bed till it's done and then tomorrow you owe me 8 more sentences. If this happens again you will get double the homework and then owe me pushups on top of it.

OK lets see now how many more days this week he comes home w/o doing his hw.. If it's not completed in school that's ok by me.. He has time issues. But if it's not started.. ohhhhhh then he owes me.

Then next control issue.. all day long i tell him up he tells me down. i tell him left he tells me right.. over and over this goes all day long. I say black it's white.. There were so many issues I cant even tell you on Friday. So finally after trying to hook up his own personal alarm clock that I got him and him telling me for the upteenth time how do to my own job.. grrrrrrrrrr I had enough.. Go give me 50 pushups... with this I got I hate you I want to go to a new foster home. I told him sorry You are not leaving here. I will not be sending you away. Then after the grueling time w/ punishment, I told him that I am going to treat him the same way i treat my daughter. I expect the same respect from him. The following day.. we had the same conversation. I now got from him why cant you be like the other foster parents they dont care about me and I dont want you to care about me. I said sorry you are under my roof and I will love you the same that i love my daughter and you will be treated like one of the family. And this means that you follow the rules, I will love you, and every night I will tuck you in and kiss your forehead and wish you sweet dreams.

OK now tell me this.. What are other foster parents doing that they do not show the kids in their houses love and respect??? I can not have a child in my house that I do not give a piece of my heart to.

I have not had a problem with him other than setting limits and following through so that he knows what will happen if he doesnt do what I say. He is really the sweetest little boy that might get lost in this system.


AJ