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I don't know whether I experienced PADS.I certainly felt very low the first year of our child being placed with us-I never needed medication though.
Yes it was harder than I thought it would be(and I did think it would be hard.)
The hardest part for me was the conflict between my bkids and the new child, the very controlling passive agressive behaviour of dd and my own horror that I did not love this child when being an adoptee I thought I would be able to bond with her and relate to her.I had worked through loads of my own adoption issues in great depth before adopting, but I found my daughters pain resonated so much with my own pain that emotionally I felt completely empty.Also trying to meet the emotional needs of 4 unhappy bkids was a strain.
BUT 3 years on things are so much better.We have faced the stuff of nightmares,had prolonged times of despair and more tears than I can count but I feel so much more back to normal than I ever thought I would be.The resolution of my own pain has been fast tracked.Dd is definitely bonding and I feel that too.Relationships between kids is much better, though there are the occassional conflicts still.
I expect there to be more problems ahead, but I am not crippled with fear.It certainly develops you as a person.
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