[thediva320]

I know exactly how you feel and what you are going thru. I contacted my bmom via letter around April. On May 8th she called me. By May 15th she planned on coming and was here. She didn't ask if it was okay or if I even wanted to meet her quite yet. I did want to meet her eventually, just not 7 days after our first phone call. At any rate, if I have any advice I can offer is that you should be clear about what you want and what you are comfortable with. If you are not comfortable meeting your bmom in 3 weeks, then you need to tell her that. My bmom also said that she wanted to get to know me and that she always thought about me. She made a lot of promises to me very early. I felt overwhelmed and like she was being way to pushy. After a failed face-to-face, she returned home just 3 hours after she landed here. Then called me up and TOLD me, didn't ask, but TOLD me that in December she planned on coming here again so I could meet her husband and my 2 half brothers.
I know how hard this is that you are going thru. I know that it might seem overwhelming and at times just plain out of control. But it is very important that boundaries are set from the beginning and that everyone involved adheres to those boundaries. My bmom and my reunion failed miserably. Partly because I didn't speak up and tell her exactly how I felt about meeting. But mostly because when I did try to speak up about things that were VERY important to me, she ignored me. We haven't spoken now for one month, and it appears that it we won't be speaking at least in the near future. I am not saying yours will turn out like mine, but be sure to stand your ground and be open, honest and up front with your bmom and encourage and let her know that she needs to do the same for you.
Things will work out in the end. Be patient, keep your head up, and keep posting. We are here to help you thru every step of your reunion.