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I was wondering the same thing from the other thread. I think where I come down is that it isn't in the child's best interest to be burdened with an adult's pain---no matter how genuine or justified that pain may be. I'm the parent, it's my job to do what I believe is in his best interest until he's old enough to do that himself.
So would I shield my adopted child from a birthmother sharing that with a child? Yes, while he is a child. I don't believe an adult shouldn't be using a child---any child--- as a vent for their own anger or regret.
Once my child's an adult, I have to hope that I have given him the skills and good judgement to deal with pain or guilt, because I can't shield him from it any more than I can shield him from any of the other curve balls life throws us.
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