[Bug-n-Bears-Mommy]

My son was conceived thru rape. His mother was 13 at the time and the alleged father was 22. He had actually cultivated her to believe they were in a relationship and would be together forever. More so than a violent physical attack, it was a deeper mental abuse. He knew he was a level 3 sex offender and was aware of her age. They went "camping" together and after the weekend the police showed up at the place he was supposed to have been registered. Right there in front of her and the police he denounced even knowing or having anything to do with her and pawned her being there off on the neighbor. Little did she know she was pregnant.

When my son was 8 weeks old she chose to be the 14 year old she was and asked that he be put in an adoptive home. Just 2 weeks before they (mother and son) had been placed in foster care together since the grandmother was running a meth house in the living area where they all resided.

As far as telling him about it, at this point he is far too young, but since we have an open adoption arrangement with his mother, I am sure it will be something we will discuss together. If he asks, we will use our best judgement as far as what we feel is appropriate to share. I really don't think there is any set age that such things are appropriate, so it would be something we would have to feel was right. Much of this depends on mental development and ability to handle and comprehend such deep topics. I can't say he will be able to handle it at say 10 years old because the average child might...then again, he could be ready for such things at an earlier age...hard to say.

As far as contact with the alleged father...NO...NO...NO!!! He is a level 3 sexual predator who was first convicted of the rape of a 6 year old boy when he was just 15. I will do everything I can to protect my son from ever seeing or even knowing him or any person in his family. We have changed his name and SS#...we will do anything up to and including restraining orders to protect him. I very much dread the day we will be asked about him and at this point have no idea what to tell my son.

I love him...no matter who the father is, no matter the choices his birth mother may have made in the past (and I hope everyday that she is safe and doing well)...I love him with all my heart and regardless of the conditions that brought him into this world it will never change.