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Originally Posted by Cmara
I am a little confused as to you saying your b mom doesn't really seem to know how many children she had???? Maybe I was reading it wrong. You say that you are having a hard time forgiving her. Maybe she hasn't fully opened up to you about what her life was really like. She may have been so lost in her own life that it all just got away from her.
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I'll try to clear this up! LOL
OK from what I've read in the papers she (**) gave me I have, I think, maybe up to 6 BBrothers. I say think because of the name thing.
For example: Matthew Carig, Craig Matthew, Richard Craig etc... all with the same last name of Reed.
So I have no idea if the names are wrong or they are all separate people. My ** had searched and found 2 of the bbrothers and after reuniting, they won't have anything to do with her. I'm not quite sure what happened because it was before we found each other and again I got a couple different stories from her about why. I haven't had contact from any of my bbrothers at all. She seemed excited to bring out her search papers and show me all of it. But when I asked anything about them I get different versions or stories. Like how many there were, what their names were etc. And according to her my bbrothers are about a year apart (actually some about one year and one month apart)each year starting about 1959-60 ish to when I was born in 1967.
It's kind of like when I asked her about the name of the man that signed my Birth Cert. First she said well I don't know why HE signed it, he's not your father and even if he was HE's DEAD. Yep just like that. He's Dead. Then told me, that man died in his car with a bar-fly woman (her words) one night outside a bar drunk in his car. They both died of carbon monoxide poisoning. Then in a conversation much later she said "Well yes he was your father" and "I never said he wasn't you father". Even when my DH was in the room, right next to me and he heard her too.
I'm so darned confused. I can't get straight answers from her. And with a falling out I had a couple of years ago with her I don't think I'll be getting any answers any time soon either. I gave up because she kept saying Ask me anything.. please if you want to know anything just ask. So I do and get conflicting stories. I'm not sure if she just really doesn't remember how many she had or if she's just making things up with what she thinks I want to hear. KWIM
The falling out we had was when we got into a minor disagreement and she screamed over the phone "Well, you know you only have one Mother" meaning her. This was only couple months after losing my Amom suddenly and very unexpectedly, which she knew all about. That was the final knife in my heart. I know that may sound dramatic but that's how it felt.
I know this is probably all jumbled up. But my thoughts are as well. Thank You for taking the time to respond to me and add your thoughts, I appreciate it.