[snuffie]

Some people are just that way. Some are the "callers" and some are the "callees". Some are so busy with their own lives that there is little room for anything or anyone else and even when there is a major occurence they are so set in their ways its just normal for them to go on the way they have been in other relationships.

An adoptees position is so different than our bfamilies. They have always known "who" they are. We haven't. Their questions can be so easily answered with just a word or two from their parents. Ours can't. We have to search and wonder and pray and every bit of info. gained is so prescious.

It doesn't sound like you absolutely don't want any contact from them - it just may be that you want the contact you do have to be different. But we can't force people to be the way we want them to be no matter how hard we try.

Maybe just getting very busy with something you really enjoy and taking your mind off of them -making them less "important" in your life (easy to say, hard to do) would help. And when you do speak to them maybe letting them know how important they are to you and how much you really want the info. they have.

I know when my reunion was very new, I would stress over hearing or not hearing from my bfamily. Now it is much more relaxed and I try not to stress over it. It helps my sanity a lot!


Snuffie