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I don't think there is an easy answer to your problem, however consider this... look at your son... you will love this next child as much as you love him. Don't think that giving the baby up at birth will change that. It will be hard and will affect you the rest of your life. And it may affect your child in ways you cannot understand. Adoption is so hard. I am a birthmother from the late 1970's. Hopefully things are different now, but I received very little counseling and what I did receive was aimed at convincing me to place my child. I suffered years of self-esteem problems and heartache, wondering where my son was and how he was doing. I am a very succesful individual, as a wife, parent and in my career -- but it didn't stop me from thinking how horrible I was for giving away my child.
My advice is to get counseling. Make sure that the whatever situation you choose is best for you, your son, and especially your unborn child. I will not say that adoption is not good and appropriate in some situations, but be careful! If you do choose adoption, make sure it is an open adoption.
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