[alphagal]

Hello all. Just curious if other adoptees have 'pushed' away their birth families once they've made contact.

The past month or so I haven't wanted to have contact with bdad and bsiblings. 3 weeks ago bdad and i were on the phone and I finally brought up the subject of bmom (we've been talking for 9 months and never brought her up). Needless to say the phone call ended abruptly on his end. Now I have the feeling I don't want them in my life. I feel angry, even though I'm not. It's almost like I want them to suffer of ME not wanting contact with them.

I think all of this stems from the fact of how open I am to relationships with them all. I'm just a friendly person and have shared numerous photos with them (on their request) about the things I've been up to this year. Yet I never receive anything from them, even though I've asked plenty. Also I hate how I've always answered the phone when they've called. I just feel too available. But I don't want to play games and not answer the phone or having to wait an obligatory 3 days before responding to an email. Because that's not me! I always stop what I'm doing to chat on the phone or reply to an email to anyone.

Anyways I figured out yesterday I was attempting, in my own feeble way, to push away from them. Not that they notice. My husband says it wouldn't be nice of me to cut contact with them because I initiated the search from the beginning. And I agree, that wouldn't be polite.

So...anyone have advice or similar stories??

AlphaGal