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hi,
i'm sure you are not alone in feeling this way and i agree with all the other posts--you will need to really think this through and come to terms with whatever your decision is.
I went through a high risk pregnancy with twins. I was on bed rest, had to quit my job, and then they were born at 27 weeks anyway and spent 3 months in the NICU. So even with pregnancy and vaginal birth, i still experienced a lot of loss and feelings of having my body fail. They are almost 6 now and perfectly fine.
(I've also had 4 miscarriages so I'm familiar with loss of that type too)
For #3, we chose adoption. For us, this was MUCH easier and in no way a "lesser" parenting experience. While the paperwork, waiting, etc. are all miserable--no one is risking their life in the process (or at least in most "normal" cases, i guess!) as was the case with the biological route for us.
Personally I feel that pregnancy/delivery are neat things to experience, but so is travelling to a foreign country to adopt a baby. Yet in BOTH cases, the actual process of OBTAINING a child, is very short when compared to actually PARENTING/LOVING the child.
good luck with your decision.
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