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I don't want to be that person.....
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but you're not that person Aray, you're you...
you're a fun person who does all these things
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we bike, we go to the beaches, we travel a little bit, we play tag at the park
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you sound like a cool mom...who can definitely strap that baby on your back (if you chose to)...
i'm very glad you came to the forums....I reallllllllyyyyyyy hope it helps you to find peace with your baby.