Quote:
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Originally Posted by aray
I feel as though it would be 'less devestating' for the child to grow up in an adopted environment.
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I am an adoptee who was surrendered to adoption
because my mother was married- but
not to my father. I am #4 of six children born to my mother, and the only one adopted.
I've been following the threads here for the last several days, and have refrained from posting because of my feelings of what happened in my life in a somewhat similar situation to yours......
I would like to offer my feelings about the comment above, tho.
Less devestating?? To live and grow up with genetic strangers? Can you imagine being born a kitten, and growing up in a giraffe family?
Or how about Tarzan- .....what was it like for him to be raised by the apes, and then, reintroduced into his own kind? Do you think he felt ackward in both families? I do... This is probably what I most identify with.... not really 'fitting in' or 'belonging' to either family.
If I had been given a voice, and a vote- and if I couldnt have stayed w/ my mother- I think it would have been next best to have been able to stay within my own clan.
Some here will surely remind us that blood does not make a family. That would be a nice thought if it were true in all adoptive families. I happened to get a family that reminded me all thru my life that I was not "real".
Less devestating?? go look at some of the boards and see the joy/happiness and excitement by the new forever families.... kinda hard to explain- its a double edged sword imho- they
should be happy- but- is it just me - or aren't they kinda dancing on bparent graves- saying its a good thing she isnt there for you? How does that make it less devestating to a child?
btw- i dont think anyone has offered this link
http://www.whiteoakfoundation.org/whatbpshouldknow.htm
What You Should Know If You're
Considering Adoption For Your Baby
Copyright 2001 by Heather S. Lowe
I wish you truth and clarity as you make this decision for your baby.