[MorrisFamily]

My husband is adopting my 11-year old daughter. The final hearing for adoption was today. The judge called my daughter into her chambers and asked her if she wanted to change her name. (She has my maiden name, the birthfather was never involved and is not on the birth certificate, he signed consent to adoption form.)
My daughter said no.
So the judge promised her that she would do the adoption and not change her last name.

Then she came back into the courtroom and signed the adoption paperwork, but informed us that we would need to take my daughter to counseling to "adjust" to the name change, and re-scheduled another court date for the legal name change to 2 days before school starts. (2 months from now).

I thought in the state of Oklahoma that the child had no choice until age 14.

Also, our attorney said the judge had never taken a child into chambers before during an adoption hearing, that this was quite unusual. And for her to give my daughter false hope that her name would not be changed seems wrong.
Also, I asked for the opportunity to tell my daughter her options - whether to change her name now, or see a counselor and change it in 2 months, the judge wouldn't let me see her.

Is this normal? Is it legal for the judge to behave this way? My daughter is freaking out now because the judge promised her one thing and she found out that the judge scheduled something different. She does not want to see a counselor and she thinks the judge lied to her.

Is there anything we can do?