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I really like mom2grlc advice. I would just add that when I talk with our fd about the going home thing, instead of saying her parents need to be "better," I just keep it at a simple "safe"--that the judge needs to believe they can parent her "safely" again.
I did not want her to think that making parents better, that is, getting "better parents" in kid-think, was the goal. In kids' minds, there is always a "better" family around the corner--richer, nicer, more fun, etc., and if that were the criteria, they would be moving from one to the next for the rest of their childhoods. We know how unreal that conclusion is, but that could easily be kid-think.
Also, if she did go home, I didn't want to set the bar too high on her expectations. Judges don't decide on the basis of who is the "better" parent--our system assumes that, given a minimum level of safety (actually not even that, just unproven by "clear and convincing evidence" danger), that the "better" parent for that child is the first parent.
Finally, depending on your local agency and court philosophies, missing a few visits may not be considered such a big deal. Courts don't always expect perfect compliance with any part of the case plan. During her first removal three years ago, our fd's father actually got arrested at the visitation center for public intoxication nine months into the case and three months before the judge returned her home. He and the mother had also missed many visits. So, you never know.
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