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Do NOT accept a child with issues beyond what you want just because you are getting discouraged. We did that. We were so afraid that we would never have a child placed with us, that we overlooked issues that we had previously said no to. While I love my daughter with all my heart, it is so very hard.
Also, realize that you probably will not be told all about the child. Almost all older children have been sexually abused but it isn't always known. If no sexual abuse is a criteria for you, you will have a long wait, and then you can't be sure.
For a child to be in a treatment center, the behaviors must have been extreme. A child isn't put into RTC on a whim. Its much cheaper for the state to place them in foster care, so therefore, this child must have had such extreme behaviors that he could not live in a home. Not being a downer, just pointing this out to you.
Please do more research on this child prior to bringing him into your home. It sounds like the birthmom is blaming the birthdad for abuse. I doubt thats the case. If she is so willing to give him away because of a new boyfriend, I can only imagine what else she has done. He obviously means very little to her. This points to neglect, abuse and sexual abuse.
Tread cautiously for your son's sake.
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