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thanks so much for that advice about closing the door completely,, we dont want to have to do this as its not a nice feeling, but feel we have done everything we can its up to her now to keep to the contact agreement, i most of all dont want our DD to come to us in the years to come and tell us its our fault that bmother went away very hard decision but thanks for your openess its great to speak to someone who knows what its like..
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