Sorry.. I'm pretty new to the whole world of adoption... including the lingo.
I am actually an expectant mom (Emom? heh).
I know that it will be tough. I'm not expecting to not experience grief and loss. Fortunately, I am blessed to have an amazing support network of family and friends.
But I do feel at peace.
I think that if God had intended this child to live in my home, with me as his mother, this pregnancy would have come at a different time.
I also think that had me and my husband been together, or had I been financially stable, I might have been blind to God's true intentions for this child.
I don't know you, don't know if you're a religous person, but please don't let my talk of God turn you off.
I have made some very, very bad decisions. My choices and circumstances led me to the place where I am now. I went through a very deep depression, a very black time... then I found out I was pregnant.
I was angry, depressed, upset... then, suddenly, the clouds cleared and I saw light for the first time in a long time. God sent me this child to wake me up, to remember who I am... and, more importantly, to answer the prayers of a couple who has been praying for THIS child for years.
So, yes, I do feel complete peace. Again, I don't expect to coast through emotionally, but I do know the path I've gone down is the right one.
Peace be with you.