Brenda
I agree with you in part. Force is subjective. I don't live in the States. In New Zealand single-parenthood is supported by the State and the resources are there for those who need it. Limited resources, but enough to raise a child with free medical care and accommodation supplements. Does that make it easier to parent? I guess it solves the immediate problem of how can we survive out there on our own. But if a woman has decided to relinquish, all her energy is then put in to the quality of life offered by prospective adoptive parents. In my original post I believe that living with a prospective family would give a mother security in the long term. She is able to make a real connection with the family and after placement would continue to foster that connection with child and family. Perhaps I should moderate my reply to the poll and say those that are committed to placement could find it beneficial. I made my decision to place independently and assume others did or do too. (Of course I know that is not always the case). In my day open adoption was not an option, but today it is commonplace and the closer the connection between the parties, surely the easier it must be for them both to feel comfortable with their dual roles??? Like I said, the one women I know who did "board" with her childs aparents has had access to, and knowledge of her child from birth to adulthood. Oh...how I wished I had that too. It would have made the intervening years so much easier for all concerned.
Ann
