[Fran27]

Ok I need to rant. I'm hoping I will feel less like the nutcase everyone thinks I am if I hear that I'm not alone in this.

Basically, we finished our homestudy two weeks ago and we are now officially on the list in our agency. We know that 20% of their placements are emergency ones. So we started buying baby stuff about 3 weeks ago, just in case, you know, even if we know we will probably have to wait months. We got basically all the stuff we will need in the first couple months (thanks god for the local thrift shop for clothes). I don't like having to do things in the last minute, so I wanted to be safe in case we end up with an emergency placement.

My problem is that, as you see, I feel like I have to justify my actions all the time. And frankly, it stinks. I could live with the weird look at babies'r us when we ordered the crib, bought a car seat or a mattress. I could live with the cashiers comments like 'do you want a gift receipt?', 'is this for any registry?' etc. What's really getting to me though is all the comments about how we are getting ahead of ourselves, 'isn't it a bit premature?' and all that crap coming from the family.

Has anyone else felt the same way when buying baby stuff before a placement? Just looking around at babies'r us waiting for someone to get our dresser/changing table today, I just felt totally out of place already. I was really looking forward to finally be able to buy things, but it's really turned into a bittersweet experience.

I had to get this off my chest. Please tell me I am not alone to feel/have felt this way!