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During this period she requested that our agreement include phone communications. We felt like we had to agree, but were somewhat concerned because the adoption happened quickly and we really are still getting to know one another. When are son was born we had to stay near the birthmother for two weeks while the legal paperwork cleared. She demanded daily visits for long periods (4-10 hours) even though we weren't sleeping and wanted time of our own to bond with our son.
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Not to be rude, but that was also her time with him as well. If you were waiting for paperwork to clear, then, legally she had every right to be with him and could have kept him at her house should she have desired. Your comment about the phone call agreement also sounds as though you merely agreed to it so that you could "get" the child. This is where problems with first and adoptive parent relationships begin: when one side does something simply to appease the other or one side does something simply to get something from the other. Open and honest communication, including communication about intention, is the key to making a relationship work.
Beyond that, if you're feeling that she is being too "intrusive," you need to set boundaries. Simply tell her that you are uncomfortable with phone calls and more than one visit a year. If she calls you out on dropping the phone calls, saying that you promised it in order to get her child, well, she's not too far off base on this one. However, it is now your right, as the child's parent, to set the boundaries. Firmly, but compassionately, tell her that you're overwhelmed with the level of contact. Remind her that her presence in the child's life is important but, for the time being, you'd like to resort to letters and the one visit a year until you can get into a more secure place in your parenting.
Be prepared for her to be royally ticked off. I would be. However, if you aren't firm with it, it won't change. Best of luck.