[MissyAmomChina]

Hi,

Ok, I'm guilty of being overly anxious about some adoption issues when my daughter was newly home--despite the fact that she had a wonderful transition. I participated in some larger online adoption groups (not here). There the discussion is that all children with adoption have issues. All kids are traumatized. All children who were in oprhanages (this is a Chinese adoption group) have Post Traumatic Stress Disorder.

Good sense told me in the beginning that "all" simply can't apply to a group of children. Yet as the anxiety of new motherhood took ahold of me and sleep deprivation took it's toll, I started over thinking some things. I found myself thinking "Is this an adoption/orphanage issue?" Well, as I calmed down and sleep became more of regular thing, my rationality came back. I thought to myself "My daughter is an individual and label or no label, as her mother, I do what's best to meet her needs."

Now, as I watch my very typical daughter thrive, I can read the lists again. And I've even had a good laugh or two. Once a discussion came up over 2-3 year olds having fears of fireworks and costume characters (people dressed up as mascots etc). Well, I kid you not, the list started to associate these extremely normal fears and tie them to being adopted!