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I hope it isn't common, but foster parents cause grief in the adoptive placement frequently enough that it was covered in the training in our county.
My son's foster mom refused to participate in the transition at all. I only got information on habits, preferences and rituals 2nd hand through the SW - as the worker was delivering him and a carload of stuff to our house at 8 pm!
The foster mom may have hoped to adopt him, thinking no placement would be found for him with his sister. She didn't say the visits weren't going well, but she pulled everything she could think of to make it difficult for us and to cut them short. Later I find out this woman is a child therapist! One of the social workers finally told me after the foster mom had pursued de facto parent status at the children's TPR and was trying to get court-ordered visitation.
So the sad result is that our son is not likely to have any ongoing contact with someone he really loved.
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