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Honestly I think too that it would be in his best interest if his foster family was allowed to adopt him. From the links you gave us, it sounds like they were not found to be unfit parents, but simply one silly rule is keeping them from being allowed to adopt him.
When I first started looking at adoption and we looked at adopting through the state, I was very clear that I would not adopt a child whose foster parents wanted him or her. I told the social worker that I would only take a child in that situation if they were proven to be abusive or something. Had I been in that situation I would have turned the child down. I would not want to be a part of taking a child from a home where he was loved and bonded because of a technicality. I also would have refused to participate in taking a child suddenly when the family was willing to do a gradual transition. I would have wanted to make it better for the child and for the child's sake I would have wanted to talk to the woman who had raised my child and knew him best. The state is at fault, the social workers were the ones wrong here and you just got caught in it. I have a feeling you would do the exact same thing in her position. If they win in court, will you appeal? If so you are doing the same thing you are angry at her for doing. You are both wanting to keep the child you see as your son. Perhaps had things been done differently you would have been friends. Had you done a gradual transition, maybe they would have felt better about you taking him and would have seen your love for him. I think the sudden transition probably hurt him a lot. I will keep him and both families in my prayers. A silly technicality has torn apart two families and one innocent little boy.
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